I will not let Pain have its way!


Today marks a year since my last post………. Why? Why did I stop writing? My husband asked me that this morning…… I didn’t know how to answer….. I still don’t. I think at lot of it has to do with fear. Fear of not being heard…… I understand what that is like. When I was sick I didn’t feel heard…. by doctors I was paying to help me….. by my friends and family……. by anyone. It was lonely, isolating, confusing time in my life. I was asked the other day why I choose to put a picture of me in the hospital 2 years ago as my resent profile picture….. I thought about it….. I put it on as a reminder not to forget where I have come from….. I choose to live…. I choose to rise from the ashes and fight for a blessed life!!!!

A little story about that picture…… That picture was taken by my husband Brian right before I was taken from him and held against my will for 11 days…… tortured…… college hospital will still not release the reason why they held me…. they have denied me that right. The more I speak and write about what happened the more others are coming to me about their stories….. being held against their wills…. US Citizens… taken captive….held in warehouses throughout California….. forced into treatments……freedoms taken away……not listened too…. their savings depleted…. reputations shattered…. Why? Who is profiting from doing this to our friends and families? Who is in charge of this? How do we combat this injustice? All I can do is share my story….. Speak for what is right, true, noble, just, kind,loving…… I choose Life! I choose to be the change. I choose to speak for the least, the last, and the lost!


14 thoughts on “I will not let Pain have its way!

  1. Thank you for your vulnerability! I have found in the short time I’ve been blogging that WordPress is a healing community, and your voice is heard! I’m sorry for what you have been through. Keep writing – processing your pain lessens mine!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I once was Shackled
    My two legs were in like a pair of handcuffs
    But around my ankles………..life has its ways and we just sit there and observe…..will-
    ness bares no resemblance…… losing ones self is a full time job reimbursement comes in the form of tormentation mentally physically until there’s nothing left accept bones and skin
    Sorry I’m having a real bad day
    I’m usually more reserved when I meet someone for the first time,I just went Rogue
    passed go collect 200 dollars
    As Yoursly Sheldon

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I read this again…….I’ve walked in your shoes way too many times……a lot of my story is in my early days posting……….I am a survivor of suicide………my shingle is always out and of course my door is always open
    As Sheldon Yoursly


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